Family: 6 Tips to Make Family Prayers Fun

I wish I could have captured the transformation of her expression on camera. At 5 months old, she couldn't sit on her own, so we propped her in a bean bag in our living room. Her expression was disengaged, uninterested in whatever the rest of the family was up to. Until my husband played the first chord on his guitar. Suddenly her face lit up, her legs started kicking, her arms started waving, and she turned her smile first on Daddy playing music and then on me ("Mommy! It's family prayer time! Yay!! My favorite time of the day!").
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We want our children to approach the Lord with reverence but we also want them to see Him as approachable. Family prayer time isn't the same as family play time; but there's no reason it shouldn't be enjoyable. Here are some considerations we've found helpful in structuring our family prayers for every member of our family.
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Appropriate to their ages
Young children respond better to simpler prayers and songs with hand motions. Older family members will appreciate progressively more complex songs and hymns. If you have a wide range of ages, consider including some of each in your worship time together or alternating with one day geared toward the younger children and another day geared toward the older ones.
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Adjusted to their personalities
Some children are more flamboyant and will enjoy a louder, interactive worship time. Others are more reserved and will feel more comfortable with a focus on the contemplative or with structured prayers that don't require them to compose something on the spot. Not that you should completely cater to their preferences: it's a safe environment for everyone to be pushed out of their comfort zone. But balance that with what they are naturally inclined toward.
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Everyone participates
Our family thought we were crazy when we asked for music making items for our toddlers. Noisemakers? On purpose? Are you sure? But it gave a way for our daughters to actively participate in our family worship even before they knew the words to sing. Readers lead the prayers following our prayer charts. Writers add thanksgiving items all of us would like to contribute to our Thanksgiving Basket. The child of the day chooses the mystery when we pray a single decade of the rosary together. Our oldest is always asked to say a trip prayer whenever we set out in our van for more than half an hour drive. Family prayers should involve everyone in the family according to the type of prayer you want and their individual abilities, not just a time for everyone to listen and try to behave while Dad says a long prayer.
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Train them to pray
Don't expect them to know how naturally. Model the behavior you want, give them specific words to recite or sing, and teach them gradually one step at a time. Our family prayer times look very different from what they started out as. Our oldest turns 7 next month, so we expect more from her than from her baby sister and certainly much more than she was capable of in the past. A year ago we took turns (being charismatic) saying a phrase out loud (Hallelujah, You are the King of kings, I love you Jesus, Praise the Lord) and everyone repeated what was said. Now after each song we expect both our older daughters to join us in vocal praise and worship, and they do. Our baby might or might not need us to step back to the repeating pattern for awhile: since she has 4 people to model her prayers on she might simply pick up what's expected but we will return to the simpler version if she needs that.
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Schedule it in
If half the family doesn't wake up until after Dad leaves for work, don't schedule your family prayers in the morning. You might schedule other prayers then, but look realistically at your schedule for a time when everyone can participate. Maybe that's just before or just after your family mealtime. Maybe that's just before bedtime. Maybe you schedule it for everyday, planning to really only pray together 1-3 times a week. One thing is certain: if it's not on your calendar, it's not likely to ever happen.
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Short and sweet
Our family prayers start with a simple doxology, followed by 2 songs (0-4 short verses apiece) with praise and worship in between the songs, concluded by an Our Father. Personal prayer times are around 5 minutes long, with Bible reading another couple minutes and prayer journals as short or long as the children themselves decide. Normal mealtime prayers don't take long and seasonal activities either replace another normal prayer/Scripture activity or last no more than a minute more. I'd rather pray for short moments throughout the day than schedule something to long to maintain every day. The length and particular structure can (/should) always be changed according to the ages and needs of the family.
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What do you really want to accomplish in the spiritual life of your family? It won't necessarily be accomplished by imitating our family's prayers exactly (besides, those prayers tend to change at least once a year as our own ages and needs change). Don't allow the impossibility of implementing what you think is a perfect family prayer structure stop you from praying together in another way. Go ahead and start something you think might work and adapt it as it seems best for your family.
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Linked with Works for Me Wednesday, Modest Monday